ORDER Psychic TV added 27 May 1999
You think that those wriggly lines and shadows you get on your TV
screen are caused by air traffic overhead? You think that Roseanne
Barr and Calista Flockhart really have bodies shaped like that?
You think that Fran Drescher's voice is real? You believe TV news
readers and weather nitwits? (Oh, OK. Nobody believes either of
them.) You are wrong, wrong, wrong!
Older folk will remember The Twilight Zone (dada dada dada dada).
Well, now it's come true - this man controls the vertical, he controls
the horizontal. He can change what you see on your TV by the power
of his mind. The only flaw in his argument is that he claims to
have made politicians appear to talk nonsense. Where's the skill
in that? I always thought it was in the job description.
Firmage: The Quest For Truth added 18 May
I couldn't put it off any longer. Joseph
Firmage used to be at the top of a multi-billion dollar Internet
company, then one day he jumped (or was pushed) to dedicate his
life to telling us about the aliens amongst us. Sillier than L.
Ron Hubbard? Smarter than Wittgenstein? Dumber than a roof tile?
Mr Firmage may be all three at once, but he knows how to make a
good-looking web site. The scary thing is that when you read this
stuff, it makes sense.
Strangely, this site now just contains white text on a white
background saying that the site is being rebuilt. I have
heard rumours that Joe has recanted and is rehabilitating
himself. News will be posted as soon as I have any.
PB September 2001
and MANKIND added 12 May 1999
Web sites are sometimes criticised for having too much graphical
content. This one has a lot of words, a point which is illustrated
by the thousand or so words which occur before the phrase "With
that said, lets get going..." Then again, there is a lot that
needs to be said here. The sacred mushroom amanita muscaria is the
origin of all major religions, gave us legends like the golden fleece,
caused us to put presents under Christmas trees, dominated art,
music and literature, and generally gave everybody associated with
it a good time. (I actually typed "a god time" there -
Freud is rehabilitated.) This has to be the most influential vegetable
since the apple in the Garden of Eden - but wait, it seems that
that was really a mushroom.
Of course, organised religion has been hiding the facts from
us for centuries. "Eat not of the fruiting body of the fungus
of good and evil" and "Take, eat, this is my mushroom"
just don't have the same ring to them.
Loon of the Month
|You would think
that there was no real competition this month. How could
anyone beat Joe Firmage? Like Fangio, Pele, Ali, Ruth, Bradman,
Spitz, Rosewall, Doohan, and Torville and Dean, Joe should
enter the human psyche as one of the all-time great champions.
But. However. I could not resist the idea of dumping my
mind onto the computer each night and getting it back all
defragmented and virus-checked the next day.
Uploading Home Page added 4 May
Backup for the brain! If you are
like me, you forget things all the time. Imagine if you
could transfer the contents of your mind to a computer.
Would the computer become you? Would it remember your wife's
birthday, your husband's shirt size, or your ATM code. If
you loaded yourself onto a Macintosh, would you wake up
with a smiley face in the morning? What about Linux - would
you nag everyone about how free you were? Don't even think
about how often Windows ™©® crashes! Could the court subpoena
your hard disk, and would you be afraid of fridge magnets?
These are serious questions, and this site give serious
answers. I tried uploading some of my mind and got the picture
at the right of the screen. Either that's the bit with what
I know about getting rich or the system still needs some