Auction

Free the Yurko two!

Murderer Alan Yurko, darling of the anti-vaccination liars and hero to chiropractors, needs money for a legal appeal. A recent fund-raiser only collected $4,000 instead of the $200,000 needed, so Yurko has offered to sell a kidney. His organs should be in good shape as he has spent all except seven months of the last 15 years in prison for violent crimes.

I believe it would be of more benefit to all concerned if Yurko sold both of his kidneys at once. As eBay won't list human organs, The Millenium Project is prepared to manage the auction. Please remember that you are bidding for two kidneys. If you only need one at the moment you can do whatever you like with the second one – keep it in your freezer in case you need another one some day, give it to a friend, donate it to a hospital, sell it on the spot market in Hong Kong, etc.

The auction has been put on hold for a while. Some strange people who misunderstood the page or didn't get the joke offered to sell me their kidneys. Yurko will just have to sew some more mailbags to pay his lawyers and expert witnesses.

Yurko and his supporters have taken so much piss he won't be needing kidneys any more. oh yeah, $5.00 for a job lot.
Brian Smaller – August 10, 2004 18:36:00

$5.00
m – April 1, 2004 08:58:50

On January 15, 2004, some moron calling itself "Truly Amazed" posted some rubbish here which had nothing to do with this page. It has been moved to the normal mailbox page for the site. PB

One bar of gold-pressed platinum in honor of my very large 15 year old Star Trek fan son. When this child was 2 days old he had neo-natal seizures -- which until he was put on Phenobarbital were coming every couple of minutes and lasting longer and longer. Yet he had no bleeding in his eys, no broken bones and serious physical injuries (possibly due to quick and effective medical treatment). I have no sympathy or respect for anyone who beats a child to death and then blames it on seizures. I have seen seizures in a newborn, it is something I do not ever wish to see again... and it does NOT create the injuries that Baby Alan suffered. The attempt to set a child murderer free by blaming vaccines to be repugnant.
Chris Haynes – December 28, 2003 15:54:40

May I add a couple of comments to my earlier bid? $1.21 per kidney was the then current A.NZ butcher's price, which has since increased to $1.80 (each.) And, I'd sign the ancestral flint (collected from a family-owned site.) All proceeds donated to genuine medical research (NZ Kidney Foundation)
Keri Islander – October 1, 2003 18:35:25

$74.00 US. More than I usually give to charity at one pop, but it would be a special kind of charity to rid the world of a scumbag like Yurko. But if I don't win the bidding, I'll give the cash to my local health department to pay for immunizations for a few kids who otherwise might not be able to afford them.
M Bethel – September 3, 2003 05:00:07

$1,000,000i want your kidneys but would offer an extra £1,000,000 for your left testicle as i lost mine in Vietnam
david norton – July 10, 2003 18:53:48

Scary that a father of five is still using adolescent terms like "fuck you" and "mother fuckers" isn't it? I hope his kids don't pick up his disgusting vocabulary. I stopped swearing when I had my first. I consider keeping a clean tongue in my head to be all part of bringing them up right...like good education, teaching them table manners, and getting them immunized.
Mother of four. – June 16, 2003 13:10:46

Hmmm...one of my brothers had a successful kidney transplant in 1995, so we don't really *need* a couple of spares. However, I have a nice tribal background that enables me to appreciate Yurko's kidneys in quite another way (think hangi. Think steamed. Or parboiled.) I offer $1.21c (NZ). Each. And a pretty little flint ancestral knife to gouge 'em out.
Keri Islander, Aotearoa-NZ – April 8, 2003 17:42:01

you mother fuckers have no idea what its like to lose a child and if you had any sense youd think is all this shit really safe for our kids so fuck you and your kids i hope one of you looses a child then goes to prison over it
father_of_5 – February 16, 2003 14:19:03

I like being at the head of the Queue but only when I have something Intelligent to say So I'll bid 12 RMB (I'm in China at the moment) and an Esky for storage, not that I normally agree with trafficking in human body parts
M B (Mark Blandford) – January 2, 2003 22:38:03

Gee What happened to my last comment?
M B – October 16, 2002 13:09:36
(There wasn't any censorship. You can see an explanation here. PB 26 October, 2002)

I'll bet my pocket change. 20 cents and a half empty packet of PK chewing gum. I could probably use the PK as a replacement kidney. But it would probably be a waste of PK
Michael Larkin – July 4, 2002 09:30:19

I am going to have to lower my bid to 25000 prewar Chinese yen. I just found out I have to share my inheritance with my siblings. a note to Jim Laidler. I can get a 1 kilowatt CO2 laser to help with the process. we could do it remotely from the prison parking lot or a near by hillside.
robert estrada – June 19, 2002 09:15:08

Hey Jim Leider, one of your own by the name of Scoone is serving time for the same thing. Every read the court transcripts? Is it possible that a few children do have adverse reactions to vaccinations? Hands down, no doubt!
drglenn – June 18, 2002 08:15:55

I think you are misjudging Alan. Many parents had same horror story seeing their baby die, then being blamed for kiling their baby, while the vaccine killed him!! I know a real baby deterioated after vaccine I cried along with the mother! anyway, why waste words in such a hostile website with hostile people? I think if you will experience that agony yourself, you will see what goes on!!
Anonymous – June 15, 2002 05:38:08

The defence budget of India and Pakistan combined.
Adelaide – June 3, 2002 20:44:51

9000 Quatloos, and I'll throw in an extra 2 for his testicles. I will remove them for free as soon as I swing by a Dairy Queen and pick up a fresh spork.
Amanda S – May 28, 2002 05:36:18

If you're going to remove his liver, Jim, I'd like his gall.
Rosalind – May 20, 2002 09:51:44

$0.02 In order to offsett the rather low bid, I will make the following offer: as a board-certified anesthesiologist, I will offer my services free of charge for the procedure. This is far more humane than Alan Yurko was to his victim, but I strive to be a bit above that sort of slime. As an extra bonus, I will assist in the removal of his heart, lungs and liver, also free of charge. I have a surgeon (who prefers to remain anonymous) who has offered to perform the surgery free of charge as well.
Jim Laidler – May 11, 2002 12:53:22

100,000 Italian Lira. This is worth about $3 American. He deserves every bit of it.
Roger – May 10, 2002 10:18:49

$300.01 is my bid. I'd prefer to remove them myself, privately if you don't mind.
Hannibal Lecter – May 1, 2002 12:33:46

$300, but tragically I won't have any money left for the anesthesia.
Neil – April 29, 2002 23:33:48

When's the closing date? I have 250 Euro and a knife that isn't *too* rusty....
Niall – April 29, 2002 17:39:15

100 hundred confedrate dollars forgedof course and only after the kidneys areremoved.
Pierre Cloutier – April 28, 2002 03:42:53

100,000 Prewar Chinese yen. I have the bill in storage in California and if they start the operation today I will personally walk there from florida and retrieve it.
Robert Estrada – April 27, 2002 09:03:18

84,000 kalpasThat's the equivalent amount of time Alan Yurko will be reborn as somekidneyless bacteria for his spiritualcrimes.Oh, sorry! You want me to buy his kidneys for money?Not in my lifetime.
Sage Bodhisattva – April 23, 2002 21:09:55

$200.00 USD for both of them at once, extracted at my expense because nothing would please me more than to help out the community.
Christopher Keith Brown – April 17, 2002 03:11:02

?150, but only if I'm allowed to remove it myself.I should clarify that I have no skill at surgery, but I could try me best anyway.
Niall – April 15, 2002 23:16:42

I'll bid $100 (US) for them, but I don't want them delivered to me. I want them donated to the nearest medical school to Mr Yurko, to be made into histology teaching slides.
Rosalind – April 14, 2002 21:12:27

£20(GBP). I need them to kickstart the free energy machine i'm developing.
Roy Batty – April 14, 2002 21:02:18

I'll take them off his hands (or squishy bits) for free. Actually I reckon I should get paid danger money for handling anything that comes from these people.
Warwick Finch – April 14, 2002 13:37:44

I'll bid twenty bucks (Cnd) for the pair and if successful will donate them to our local psychiatric research foundation for investigation into whether there is a genetic marker for total lack of conscience.
Selinde – April 14, 2002 08:34:44

$1 – Cheap at half the price.
Peter Bowditch – April 14, 2002 01:48:46

Legal note: Any lawyers, regulators or other people who want to complain about the sale of human kidneys should take ten deep breaths and think before taking action which could be potentially embarrassing.